It took me a long time to realize how important my pre-sleep mindset was. If I tell myself: This week is going to be terrible, when I wake up, indeed it is. If I tell myself: This week is going to be challenging, but I’m prepared, and I can handle it, that, too, seems to come to pass. And if I tell myself: This week is going to be challenging, and I’m not prepared at all, but thankfully when I’m least prepared is when the real magic happens, pow: magic. I seem to have more control over the character of the world in which I wake than I initially realized. Any number of things are able to work themselves out overnight when I simply give my consciousness the power—the permission—to do so.
True, there seems to be a portion of my brain beyond my conscious control that believes I cannot have good things without suffering. That I need to “earn” or “deserve” abundance; that I don’t merit my miracle. But this is faulty thinking. As Monsignor Torgerson told us this week: God’s love is not tit-for-tat. (Indeed, be it divine or human, tit-for-tat is never love; tit-for-tat is business.) So when my I-don’t-deserve-this-amazing-thing fear rears its head, I feed it the 20th century. We have suffered, my friends. We have suffered enough to satisfy even the most voracious unconscious needs.