When my brain thinks time is narrower than it is, I reach my computational constraint (the speed of light) too quickly.
In the models I am looking at, time is a width of light. The past (moon) is too narrow. The future (sun) is too wide.
When I am at my worst, it is as if my brain’s understanding of time is too narrow. Too vaso-constricted. My heart rate skyrockets and my ears ring. It can feel as if I am actually narrower than my own blood. I lose the sensation of peripheral resistance and this results in a loss of control (CNS). I can also experience neuropathy and diminished circulation. This used to happen quite often in cold weather in my 20s (Reynaud’s). When my understanding of time is too narrow, it is as my red blood cells are actually larger than I am.
With Reynaud’s, my body could correct relatively swiftly. Lately, I seem to “get stuck” for much longer. Once my RBCs read as “the wrong size” to my brain, I can make more—but this takes time. And, by the time I make them, has the scale of time changed again?
If I am too narrow in time—too vaso-constricted—why not just take a vaso-dilator, such as niacin?
Because I use it paradoxically. When my brain knows it has niacin on board, and can vaso-dilate if it needs to, it vaso-constricts.
If I apply niacin locally in small doses (e.g. niacinamide at the site of my former skin cancer), I can sometimes temporarily bypass the paradoxical response, and get dilation without the brain interfering. In this case, I am affecting the tissues but not the consciousness—i.e. there is still a “master consciousness” (the pineal gland) whose understanding of time’s width has not been altered.
Laura Hillenbrand, famous long-haul ME sufferer, became sick on a very specific night that she details in this terrific New Yorker piece. https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2003/07/07/a-sudden-illness
After a high-iron meal, while in a state of fight-or-flight (pineal dilation?), the light of a meteor entered her eye. She was sick for the next 27 years.
My pineal gland itself can dilate or contract. In so doing, it seems to alter my brain’s understanding of pH7. When I am more dilated that time, pH7 reads as salty to me (acidic). When I am narrower than time (vaccine injury, ME/CFS), pH7 reads as alkaline.
Other things will affect my brain’s understanding of pH7. Micro dose LSD. Psilocybin. General anesthesia. Melatonin.
Also vitamins K1 (often given to infants at birth) and K2. K2 dilates my pineal gland, and I perceive the world as narrower and saltier than it is. My own skin, my lips seem very salty to me when I have K2. K1 constricts my pineal gland, and I perceive the world as wider and more alkaline.
Please note: I do not tolerate artificial supplements of any kind. When I say “K2,” I mean emu oil applied to my skin, or organic grass-fed half-and-half. When I say “K1,” I mean skin drops derived from plants applied to the skin. The last time I took synthetic K1 I had vertigo, nausea, extreme fatigue, brain fog, and autonomic dysregulation for 6 months.
Other things that help:
—Zero chemical fragrance
—Exposure to “wide” light; I never watch TV on my phone, for instance, and avoid my phone after sundown (but still use my computer, which has a much wider screen). The light of my phone confuses my brain’s understanding of the Planck length.
—Avoid conflict. This can be difficult, especially nowadays. But I have felt, repeatedly, how conflict makes me constrict—vasoconstrict—and that makes me much worse.
—Natural vitamin K2 in low doses on skin (emu oil)
—Organic meals that balance fat/protein/carb (“the zone”)
—Give my brain a “ceiling” and a “floor” to work with, in terms of time. It is constantly trying to determine how “wide” (sweet) is time? And how “deep” (bitter)? I vary in my ability to tolerate caffeine—though at times it helps me a lot, when I seem able to use it paradoxically. I often respond very positively to a drink that is both very bitter and very sweet: shots of espresso with whole milk and organic vanilla syrup. Alone, the espresso would be far too bitter. Alone, the syrup would be far too sweet. Together, they give me a floor and a ceiling to help my brain gauge time.